A Play in One Act
by
Michael Thomas Tower
Performance time: Approximately 25 minutes
© 1989-2005 Michael Thomas Tower
All Rights Reserved
Queries regarding rights to perform or present this play
in any manner whatsoever should be directed to the author
PL0505F
Synopsis
Two actors, one over the hill and on his way down and the other full of dreams and hoping to be on his way up, are in the dressing room preparing to go on stage. Through conversation and contact both very funny and very touching, harsh discoveries are made, unexpected gifts are revealed, and a torch is passed.
Characters
Marshall -- In his mid 50s, or older.
Chet -- In his mid-20s to early 30s.
Setting
The dressing room of some small theatre off the beaten path of any major "road show." The actors have access to a makeup table with an empty frame attached so they face the audience as they look into the "mirror" (individual frames may be used for two separate mirrors). Costumes are hanging on a rack nearby. Amidst the makeup paraphernalia on Chet's table is a bottle (something other than an obvious liquor bottle) with a few ounces of "liquor" in it.
Places
(at rise marshall is seated at the table, applying makeup. chet rushes in carrying a section of newspaper which he pitches down in front of Marshall.)
chet
Hey, did you see that sucker, Marshall? Wow! Damned good review! For some of us. Me and Lyla, ‘specially.
(chet quotes excerpts of the review from memory as he starts with his makeup and otherwise prepares to go on stage.)
(continuing) chet (continuing)
"Dramatic electricity on stage." That's his headline! Now is that praise, or what? "Dramatic electricity."
(A beat)
"Chet Hart and Lyla Turner are a volatile duo, bringing life to words and passion to thoughts." Read it there, Marshall. That's what the fucker says!
(A beat)
"They take our sequestered daydreams and brightly light the dark recesses of our yearning minds. Our most secret, gnawing desires drip heavily, vividly, languidly, erotically down the canvas of the stage, congealing at last with the heat of great talent and rare form." Whoa! Hear that, man? That man can really write a critique of the-a-tuh. Practically a fucking poet.
(A beat)
It doesn't bother you that he didn't mention you, does it, Marshall? Figure you're probably used to this downturn in your career by now.
Oh, jeez -- didn't mean it that way. I thought you did a first-class job out there. Always do.
(A beat)
Is that critic an asshole, Marshall? If you think he's an asshole, then I'll think he's an asshole. Just that simple. We're a team, man.
(A beat)
Should of got a mention, for god's sake. Fuck's wrong with that idiot?
(A beat)
Sometimes, though, your reaction, when Katherine says she wants a divorce? -- well, there's just a tiny bit of, uh, shakiness, guess you'd call it, in your voice that sounds, oh, just a tiny bit affected.
Ah, shit, what do I know? Forget I even mentioned it.
(A beat)
"The writer's work is potent, but it's Chet Hart that gives the words their power." Did you read that, Marshall? "It's Chet Hart that gives the words their power." The guy's a fucking poet, I tell you!
(A beat)
"In the heat of passion, it was Hart's talent that brought meaning to the moment. It was as though the playwright existed only to write the words that gave Chet Hart the reason to live, to act, to inspire."
marshall
Congratulations, Chet. You may be the only actor ever imported into Confederate country to have gotten a whole-heartedly effusive review written by an absolutely artless ex-welding teacher who is now the food, entertainment and fashion editor for the Bogalusa Beacon. Of course I'm depressed he didn't mention my name ... and that he couldn't spell yours correctly.
(chet grabs the newspaper and looks at it.)
chet
Oh, crap! Dammit, Marshall, you're right -- the guy is an asshole! And he damn well should of mentioned you. Hell, the way you turn and look out the window when Dede tells you Katherine's gone? -- so calm-like but we can feel your fucking pain, man! Jeez, that alone is worth a line or two, buddy. I mean it!
marshall
He may not have noticed it through your coughing spasm.
chet
It's that damned cracker. Why can't horse-doovers be made from bread?
(A pause)
What's pot-poorey?
marshall
What?
chet
Pot-poorey. That critic guy -- said I displayed a "pot-poorey" of raw emotion. Is that good?
marshall
Oh, yes -- it's a welding term, I think. Something to do with the way metal smells when subjected to the flame of compressed acetylene.
chet
(Considers that a moment)
Oh, no, you're not catching me with that one.
(A beat)
But don't you think he's a poet? I mean, you know, he's an asshole, sure -- but the poetry of it all ...
(A beat)
Is it possible for a good writer to be a big asshole?
marshall
It's a requirement.
chet
(A beat)
"Dramatic electricity." Hot damn! "It was Hart's talent that brought meaning to the moment."
marshall
I find it absolutely amazing that you can remember, verbatim, with all misplaced modifiers and sporadic punctuation, the bilious regurgitation of a carper's drivel published this morning, but you can't remember the closing line of Act One after four weeks of rehearsal and two months on the road.
chet
What I say there works fine.
marshall
What you say there is shit!
chet
Well it just so happens that I don't understand the closing line.
marshall
I have not even the faintest hope that you might ever understand the line. I simply live with the unrequited desire that you might someday utter it.
chet
(Quoting quickly and mechanically)
"I-pray-that-when-you-wake-up-tomorrow-you-can-find-the-lost-part-of-yourself."
marshall
Do my ears deceive me?
chet
(Not quite as mechanically but with no real meaning)
"I pray that when you wake up tomorrow you can find the lost part of yourself." See, I know the fucking words!
marshall
Well then might I suggest that you try speaking them on the fucking stage sometime? You'd be surprised how much an audience appreciates getting what they pay for!
chet
Jesus!
(A pause; they continue their preparation.)
(continuing) chet (continuing)
Marshall, do you ... like ... just ... fucking hate me, man?
marshall
Of course I don't hate you, Chet. One must care about something before one can hate it.
chet
(A beat)
Cold, man.
(A beat)
So ... be honest with me. You really just ... don't like me?
marshall
I think you're a bewildered person and an ambivalent actor. And don't counter me with the words of a convert to orthodox polyesterism who writes his critiques with a soldering iron! We are here, working together, under circumstances that almost certainly prove the existence of Hell. But I don't hate you, dislike you, despise you or suffer any deleterious emotional pangs because of you. You simply have no purposeful presence in my life, save our occasional encounters on stage -- and I'm never quite sure just where those might occur, since you seem to have no propensity for embracing the theory of blocking.
chet
Christ, man, 'scuse me all to hell for breathing.
(A beat)
I'm not that bad!
(A beat)
Case you hadn't noticed, you're even touchier than usual tonight.
(A beat)
Good thing I've got a better opinion of me than you do.
(A beat)
You know, when we started in on this show, I was really looking forward to working with you.
marshall
When we started in on this show you'd never heard of me.
chet
Carlton clued me in. First day. Told me how great you'd been ... what all you'd done ... who you used to be ...
marshall
How very past tense of him.
chet
Since we're the only guys in the cast, I figured we'd get to be friends.
marshall
Friends?
chet
Yeah ... you know ... two guys enjoying each other's company --
marshall
(Overlapping/interrupting)
I know what the word means, Chet.
chet
Well ... being on the road, away from home so much, sometimes I need a friend.
marshall
What you need is a therapist.
chet
I've got a therapist.
marshall
Fire him.
chet
(Genuinely amused)
Huh. That's funny.
(A beat)
You can be funny when you want to. ... And sometimes when you don't.
marshall
It's a curse.
(A pause as they continue preparation.)
chet
Rumor has it some New York guys in the audience tonight. ... Big shots.
marshall
What other kind of shots are there?
chet
Maybe somebody like ... George M. Cohan.
marshall
He's been dead a lot of years, but, still, you just never know what old George might do.
chet
Well, hell, I don't mean literally George Cohan, Christ's sake, but ... you know ... somebody.
(A beat)
Sam Harris, maybe.
(chet looks at marshall, considering the statement.)
chet
(Truly wondering)
He's dead, too, right?
marshall
Even longer.
chet
Probably not him, then.
marshall
Probably not.
chet
But one time, hey -- in Bismarck, remember? Those Broadway guys came backstage and talked to Danny?
marshall
They were from Newark, not New York ...
chet
Close.
marshall
Another galaxy.
chet
They liked us.
marshall
So maybe they'll book us into their deli.
chet
Their what?
marshall
Broadway Deli, downtown Newark. Pastrami made from pilfered poodles and a three-bean salad that'll pervert your autopsy.
chet
Oh. I thought they were somebody important.
marshall
Only to the SPCA.
chet
What were they talking to Danny about?
marshall
I overheard a conversation that had to do with money owed, not offered.
chet
Oh. ... Well, you got a good review there.
marshall
And you were mentioned.
chet
Not very favorably.
marshall
As long as they spell your name correctly ...
chet
Which the poetry-wielding welder couldn't do.
marshall
You got him so excited, he was probably typing one-handed.
chet
See, there you go being funny again when you didn't mean to be.
(Pause.)
(continuing) chet (continuing)
Man, it must really be something to walk down Broadway and see your name up there on a marquee.
(A beat)
Right?
marshall
It's okay.
chet
"Okay"? Your name in lights, on Broadway, and it's just ... fucking "okay"?
marshall
It's good. All right?
chet
How old were you?
(This isn't a subject that marshall wants to discuss.)
marshall
First time, twenty-two.
chet
Damn. Wish I could have hit Broadway at twenty-two.
marshall
You're not that much older.
chet
But I'm nowhere close to Broadway.
marshall
There's time yet.
chet
My whole life it's the only place I felt like I just had to be, you know?
marshall
Yeah ... I know ...
chet
How many Broadway plays you in?
marshall
Oh ... I don't know ... several ...
chet
Don't even know for sure?
marshall
Nine. Eight Off-Broadway. Four road shows with original casts ...
chet
Damn!
So, uh, what happened? Why'd you decide to take a break from the big time? I guess it can be pretty grueling ...
marshall
Yes, that was it. I took a break -- walked off stage one night with the calm assurance that I should take a hiatus from a career that had given me nothing but a senseless excess of applause, adulation and bankable appreciation ...
chet
Really?
marshall
Money, recognition, power -- what could I possibly want with all that?
chet
Oh, now I know you're kidding me. You're being funny again, aren't you? Naw, now, really ... what was it?
marshall
What time is it?
chet
Seven forty-two.
marshall
Be calling places soon.
chet
I'm pretty much ready.
marshall
You're eyebrows aren't the same color.
chet
Oh, shit!
(Starts fixing eyebrows)
Checked props when I came in. Everything's in the right place for a change.
marshall
That'll be confusing.
(A pause.)
chet
So. You just dropped out of the big time. No reason ...
marshall
Of course there was a reason!
chet
Which was ... ?
marshall
Personal!
chet
Sorry. Didn't mean to be prying.
marshall
Prying is one of your better-developed talents.
chet
Just thought maybe you'd have some helpful hints, you know ... what to do ... what not to do ...
(Opens the bottle containing liquor)
Time for the pre-show fortifier.
(Takes a heavy slug of the liquor)
Aaah! Come on. You're welcome to join me. Plenty left here.
marshall
No. Thanks.
chet
Some people do calisthenics before a show. Some guys get off in a corner, all alone, and just ... "transcend." Worked with this guy in Jacksonville? -- got down on his knees, Bible in hand, prayed for ten fucking minutes before going out to do a really fantastic Stanley Kowalski.
marshall
God moves in hysterical ways.
chet
And this Hollywood type in Lubbock, if you can believe it, always jacked off right before going on. Didn't see him, mind you, but we could hear him in the john and one time he came out with some dicky-goo on his shoe, you know what I mean ...
marshall
Please -- I get the picture ...
chet
Me, a quick little nip of Kentucky nectar and I'm ready to hit the mark.
(Takes another big swallow; puts the bottle down and caps it)
I've never seen you drink. Do you? ... When we go out after a show sometimes, rest of us drink fire water and bubbly -- when we're not in one of those damned dry counties -- and you just sit there real quiet-like with a glass of tranquil agua -- no froth, no fizz ... never any, you know, good stuff going down.
marshall
It's my practice not to imbibe, when I'm doing a show.
chet
Noble, man. But, uhm ... well ... maybe if you had just a little? -- might take that shakiness out of your voice. Oh, shit, man, I wasn't going to mention that again.
You didn't have a problem with booze, did you? I mean, sometimes, you know, people lay off it 'cause it's a problem for'em --
marshall
(Overlapping and interrupting; exploding)
Shut the fuck up! Would it be even slightly possible for you to simply mind your own pointless business for a change! -- do something a tiny bit useful just once in your miserable little life and shut your goddamned mouth!
chet Oh shit, man, I didn't mean to, uh ... you know me, I just say stuff ... I'm always saying crap I shouldn't say ... didn't mean anything ... really. I'm sorry, man. Fucking running off at the mouth all the damn time ... |
marshall Chet, I'm sorry ... Honestly, I didn't mean that ... It's okay ... no, really ... I'm so sorry, Chet. |
(A pause.)
(continuing) chet (continuing)
Hey, man, there's nothing wrong with being an alcoholic. I mean, you know ... if that's it.
marshall
Well, you could find a few people who would argue that point with you.
chet
I've known alcoholics.
marshall
Well of course. You're in the theatre, after all -- drunks ... homosexuals ... waiters ...
chet
But they can get squared away. My old man did ... for a while ... sort of ...
marshall
I love those success stories.
chet
That what you did? That's cool, man. On the wagon ... headed back up the ladder. No problem. Nobody gives a fuck where you been long's you're living right now.
Hey, Marshall, I'll help you any way I can, man. Oh, Jesus, look-it what I been doing -- drinking like a parched pissant right here in front of you. I'll do this in the alley -- won't bring it out where it'll tempt you --
marshall
(Overlapping and interrupting)
Chet, I want to tell you something.
(A beat)
I'm not always real truthful with you ... about ... what I think ... feel ...
chet
Well fuck, man, who is? I'm used to that. Besides, I'm not so sure honesty is all it's cracked up to be, know what I mean?
marshall
No. What do you mean?
chet
(Takes a moment to think about it)
I don't know. Go ahead.
marshall
What I said before ... well, that critic -- that one -- earns no praise from me because he is, plain and simple, a lousy writer. But he wasn't altogether wrong about what you do on stage. I wouldn't have said it the way he did -- nothing close, believe me -- but still ...
(A beat)
You give a skillful performance. You truly do have ... talent.
(A beat)
You're not a bad actor.
chet
My God, Marshall -- do my ears deceive me? Why've you waited so long to say this to me?
marshall
I see too much of me in you, Chet. It's ... perplexing.
(A beat)
There are things I want you to know -- things I want to say to you ...
chet
Like what?
marshall
Like ... don't do it.
chet
I, uh ... don't know what you mean.
marshall
I know.
(A beat)
Every night, Chet, we sit here, wherever "here" may be, getting ready to go on. You open your bottle and take a drink ...
chet
Like I said, I'll take the bottle out back from now on --
marshall
(Overlapping and interrupting)
Chet -- I'm not a recovering alcoholic.
chet
But you just told me you were --
marshall
(Overlapping/interrupting)
I'm a drinking alcoholic.
chet
You just said you never touch the stuff --
marshall
(Overlapping/interrupting)
I do without it, for a while -- long enough to get a second-rate road show under my belt and a few bucks in my pocket. Then I disappear -- few weeks, month or two. When it's all over, even I won't know where I've been or what I've done ... if I'm lucky. Dry out -- some seedy little hotel in some strange town I've never seen before. Then I'll head out and start looking for another show, convince some second-rate producer that every once in a while -- those times I'm not on the boards -- I teach an acting class in Seattle. I think I was named professor emeritus last year in a school that closed in 'thirty-four.
chet
Good God, Marshall ...
marshall
And it's always the second-rate shows that won't draw the attention of anyone ... important -- and hoping never to get too close to New York. Some people have long memories.
chet
You been to the top and you still have it, man. Doesn't make sense you'd do something like that.
marshall
Sort of spiritual, don't you think? -- my quest for such deep, inner chaos?
chet
But why, man? Why do you do it?
marshall
Know what, Chet? Sometimes I do know why I do it. I have the answer! But then I sober up and can't remember what it is.
chet
Well hell, man, that's nothing to worry about now. We've got a good show going, we just signed new contracts -- two more months, five more cities, a little more money. So things are going great for now! And you know what? -- I bet we're going to work even better together now, you and me. I mean, finally we're getting to know each other.
marshall
Chet ... sometimes I do feel like hanging you from a bar like a flood light ... but other times I wish I could pick you up in my arms and sing you a father's lullaby.
chet
You really mean that?
marshall
Don't push me.
chet
I want to be your friend, Marshall. I'll do anything I can to help you.
marshall
It doesn't depend on what other people do.
chet
Well hey, we've got at least two more months winging our way around the country with this little bit of what that critic in Tucumcari called "theatrical frou-frou." And, by the way, I found out that "frou-frou" has nothing to do with acute diarrhea, thank you very much. But, frou-frou or not, people are coming to see the show, so everything's fine for now. Nothing to worry about, right?
marshall
Chet, I, uh ... I didn't sign the new contract.
chet
Whatta you mean?
marshall
I'm leaving the show when we close here Sunday. You'll have a new partner starting Memphis.
chet
I don't want a new partner!
marshall
They've got somebody coming in from Chicago who knows the role.
chet
Dammit, Marshall! Why? Why you doing this?
marshall
It's, uh ...
(A beat)
It's time.
chet
Time for what?
marshall
The thing that lives inside of me -- time to let it out for a while ...
chet
Marshall ...
marshall
I can't control it, Chet. I'm fighting like hell to keep it caged for just a few more days. I've got to let it loose ... for a while -- few weeks. Then it'll leave me alone ... for a while. It always does. It's not an ideal relationship, but we've learned to respect each other's needs. Besides, we're all the other has.
chet
Don't do it, Marshall. Don't go. Please! Memphis is big-time for us, man, and -- Jesus -- I don't know if I could even do this show without you.
marshall
Of course you can. You're a good actor -- remember?
chet
Oh, screw it, it's not ... well, shit, I guess I kind of fucking like you, you cantankerous old bastard! I care about what happens to you!
marshall
Misspent energy, son. You're wasting yourself.
chet
I didn't even know that till tonight.
marshall
(A beat)
We better get out there. Stage manager seems to have forgotten to call places again.
chet
Probably busy hiding the props.
marshall
(Enjoying the relief of the humor)
You can be funny, too.
chet
(A beat)
Marshall?
marshall
What?
chet
Can I, uh, give you a hug?
(chet is reacting emotionally but immediately notices marshall's reluctance and withdrawal, so chet takes another tack to try to justify the hug. )
(continuing) chet (continuing)
You know ... for, uh ... good luck?
marshall
(A beat)
Oh ... uh ... I'm not, uh, really a huggy person, Chet ...
(Disappointed, chet hesitates a moment, then turns to leave; but marshall stops him.)
(continuing) marshall (continuing)
Chet ...?
chet
Yeah?
marshall
When I was a kid growing up on the wrong side of the tracks in that little Texas town, we never had much money. But my mother always made sure she had a quarter to give me every Saturday afternoon so I could go to the picture show. That was more than enough to get into the Rialto and buy a sack of popcorn and a Milky Way. Mom said the flickering hurt her eyes, so it was up to me to go to the show and then tell her all about it. It wasn't till years later that I realized the flickering didn't hurt her eyes at all.
When I got my first role on Broadway, between us my mother and I didn't have enough money to get her to New York. But on the day of my opening night, I got a letter from her. It was just one sentence: "You go to the show, Son, and tell me all about it." And there was a quarter. I took that quarter on stage with me that night, and the good things started happening. Since that time, I've never been on stage without it.
(marshall takes a chain from around his neck, to which is attached a quarter. he looks at it.)
(continuing) marshall (continuing)
And you know what I found out, Chet? It really does make the good things happen ...
(A beat)
... as long as you have a dream.
(marshall takes one last look at the quarter, then slips the chain with the quarter around chet's neck. marshall immediately tries to separate himself from the moment as he turns away to a final bit of preparation.)
chet
Aw, gee, Marshall. I, uh ...
(chet grabs marshall in a spontaneous embrace.)
(continuing) chet (continuing)
Aw, man!
marshall
Oh, Chet ...
(Breaking away almost reluctantly)
Come on, "man," it's time to go to work.
chet
Hey, Marshall ...
marshall
What?
chet
(With full meaning; honestly spoken ...)
"I pray that when you wake up tomorrow, you can find the lost part of yourself."
marshall
( ... and a beat as the words are honestly heard.)
You won't remember that by the time we get to it.
chet
That was it, wasn't it?
marshall
Yes, but we're not on stage.
chet
Now I know what the line means, man!
(As they exit for the "stage" ...)
marshall
Olivier, are you now? Or Barrymore, perhaps?
chet
You talking John or Lionel?
marshall
Ethel.
-- The End --